WHAT IS A LIFE COACH AND DO I REALLY NEED ONE?

My image of a life coach made visions of Oprah Winfrey’s latest guru or Tony Robbins dance through my head. The image I had was that of a hyper, overstimulating, perpetually positive, well dressed, over groomed and often annoying cheerleader.

Someone who had a perfect vision of life in general and certainly had all the answers to a blissful life filled with days of pure joy, and whenever a challenge was encountered in this perfect life, they had all the answers and met it head on with a smile and a song! They clearly had no “issues” of their own, and they held some magical secret to success, happiness, euphoria and who knows, maybe even had a map to the fountain of youth for all I knew.

Would I have to believe in and hand over my autonomy to this mystical creature called a life coach. What could such a person offer me? Maybe in reality they were just full of BS and really great actors whose lives were filled with riches and misery all rolled into one little dysfunctional world? All the while pretending to have all the answers to life’s path of happiness.

That was my genuine image of what a life coach was. My very ignorant, uninformed and narrow minded view of this mystical creature, that was not a mystical creature at all, but a real person with issues and fears like everyone else, but who also had a unique way of looking at themselves, others and the world.

They realize that challenges arise in life and that the key to success is not from external place or force but within ourselves. I never would have dreamt that I would ever have the need for or actually use a life coach! I have had many challenges in life, the whole time thinking, I should just be able to deal with every single event on my own, since I was after all a strong person.

My biggest life challenge at the moment happens to be losing approximately 100 pounds, losing fat and becoming fit and healthy for the rest of my life, why would I not use every resource available to accomplish this?

This challenge to me, at this point, is more important and more difficult than a professional sports team or athlete trying to reach the top of their sport culminating in the professional title. Why then, would I not employ the talents of a coach? Would we expect any professional team to reach the top without a coach?

No, we would say they were crazy! This view came to me during a kick boxing session with my personal trainer ( and life coach), I was beating myself up (no pun intended:-) for allowing life to interfere with my training and dietary accomplishments. During gasps for breath and right hooks, he said something that stuck with me.

Why would I not use a coach, why would I expect myself to just ignore all external factors in life that will happen and will have an impact on the life changes I’m making. Life is not perfect (nor is any person), so why not accept the fact that life sucks sometimes and learn better coping skills to deal with those times. To learn to refocus and accept that no one is perfect.

I realized I needed to learn to incorporate imperfection into life, to accept the fact that it is ok to use a coach for something so important and so overwhelming as a life change and living a healthy happy life. That seeking help and advise is not a sign of weakness but one of strength.

So, these life coaches, I have learned, do not have all the answers but help guide us through times when we feel like we have no answers and coach us through realizing that the answers to life’s problems lie within our selves and it’s ok to use the power we have to seek new ideas and help.

They can be invaluable sources of advise, inspiration, knowledge, analysis and sometimes a simple wake up call to just look at something in it’s simplicity and not over analyze ( I ate the chocolate because…it tasted good!)!

So does everyone need a life coach, in my opinion we all do! Not everyone will agree with this of course, some people have sources of strength they find in family, friends, etc…but a coach is someone with a unique knowledge, view of people, the world around us and an unbiased relationship that will aid you in finding your own power.

Are there life coaches that lack knowledge, are unreliable, full of BS and undedicated? Absolutely, but you would be hard pressed to find any profession free from these characteristics, I’ve met nurses that have lost passion for life and work, but we wouldn’t put them all into one group, so why do this with a profession just because we misunderstand and fear it.

A life coach is not for everyone, but for me this has been one of the keys to my success, and how can I say success without also being able to say I have lost 100lbs, because I have changed my life and that is my success, with the pounds slowly falling away, fitness and health both making incredible increases and feeling positive about life! I don’t think I would have embrassed this concept without my coach.

When I encounter challenges and my mind set starts to falter and self doubt creeps in, I now have new skills that will help me cope( like with that mirror), and guess what, those negative thoughts will happen, because life is not perfect, it is about a collection of events, some positive and some negative, I need to celebrate the positive and overcome the negative!